Sunday, September 12, 2010

and Im Free Free Fallin

Ok so this week I went Cliff Diving.

Im usually not the kind of person to take the leap of faith and make that jump, take those kind of leaps, as much as I hate to admit it i'm a bit of a chicken when it comes to stuff like that. but when the idea came up to go I got extremely excited about running and jumping off of a cliff...no joke like I never get excited about that kind of stuff but this time I did.

So me and 5 friends went out to Lake Whitney and hiked up to these cliffs. Now let me tell you the hike itself was challenging, especially if you are like me and you have no hiked anything like that before in your life. It was narrow, if you lean one way you faceplant into the rock, and if you lean the other you fall off the side of a cliff....it was not pleasant...it was hard and challenging. Well When we got to these cliffs we looked over the edge and discussed jumping. then my friend Jacob goes and takes a running leap and just jumps off the edge of this cliff. My friend Sarah goes, "go big or go home" and follows right after him. Well I decided...Why Hesitate...so I jumped. No nerves, no thinking, no looking down, just before I gave myself time to think I jumped.

So I start thinking about this leap in terms of God. And in terms of my relationship with God. And I realized something about this leap. There are times when God gives us a cliff to jump, a mountain it seems, to overcome. So here you are with this challenge, with this task that lays in front of you. and you are standing there with your toes on the edge looking down, and all you see is nothing. You don't what you are getting yourself into you don't know how this will turn out. Your sick to your stomach your swallowing back the fear...and nothing seems to work you break a sweat you freak. So you decide to compromise with God and be like...you know God...why dont I try that little one over there first...I just think that it would be easier if I am comfortable with the smaller one and work my way up. I just don't know about the size of that leap...so you jump the little one. and because you freaked even over the little one you never get the strength to walk back up that cliff to jump the jump that God originally destined for you to jump.

This is how many people are on following Gods purpose...the road that they are walking on is challenging...the Hike is thin...the hike is scarier your right on the edge...then you make it to safety...but here you are at safety and God tells you to jump...jump off of that edge that you have been trusting him to keep you on for the walk so far...and now He tells you to jump? what...why...huh? I dont get it.

You know you hear so many people say that Gods path is not always clear, it is not always understandable...and the further you go the clearer the picture gets. On this Hike, it is filled with Trees and turns, and if you walked too slow...like me...you got to the point when your friends are around a bend and here you are all alone by yourself...just you and God...your stuck to follow footprints of those that have went before you. The Ground is slick and mud is deep...and you are unsure of where you are. all you have to follow are those footprints...so you walk, you go. you trust you are going the right way. and finally you reach the destination...you need to stop and take a breath...chill out and thank God from keeping you from falling. and then in the back of your head...you hear, trust me...JUMP...it is a scary thought im not going to lie...jumping off of something that you dont know will be 100% safe...knowing that the way that you land is the way that you realize if you'll make it or not. You watch as those ahead of you jump...its your turn...what are you going to do?

So there I was at that moment...I jumped I took the leap...and when I fell it felt as if the world was moving in slow motion...it felt as if the world was all the sudden spinning slowly...and then...CRASH...you hit your emerged under water...you begin to swim upward...your head pops up and you take that first breath...all the sudden...you are no longer the person that you were before you are someone new you are a "risk taker" you are an overcomer...you swim...something that after a hike and a jump is hard...but the muscles that the moves that you have made on this journey before have built and have made you stronger and more capable to do these things. So you swim...you make it back on the rock...back to the safety...and you climb....there is a headrush...you are so proud of your accomplishment...so you lay back and soak up the sun...when God whispers in your ear...im so proud of you...you did it.

The trust between you and God is now stronger, you now trust him with your life. you are strong you have more faith than you did before. You do it again and again...and before you know it...the fall is nothing the jump is easy...it is easy to make the leap it is easy to take the steps because...now you trust God to keep you safe...you trust those he has placed around you, you trust...You finally sit to rest and you look across the lake...and you see something...its a bigger cliff...God then tells you...I have so much for you, this is only the first of many jumps. You take a deep breath, swallow back your fear and whisper, "I'll Go"

You know Ive realized that the more that I get to know God the more that I realize that He will always keep me safe, he will Always keep me protected, but that does not mean that the road that he has me walk down will be the yellow brick road...something that all is safe, as long as i stay on the path...no he doesnt lead you down that...He will lead you down a path that instead looks rough and hard and challenging. but God doesnt intend to hurt you. God intends to build you...build the strength and the faith that you didnt even know you had.

You know I look back to when I was a kid and my grandfather would try to get me to go on the intertube...and like I said, I am a chicken, I would not do it. He used to always say, "look Hannah, I love you, I would NEVER put you on something or let you do something that would hurt you" That is the way that God is...He is never going to do something that is going to hurt us. He will never let us fall, but he wants us to build faith and swallow fear...because you see Gods word says in 2 Timothy 1:7 that He did not give us a spirit of fear but of power love and a sound mind...so He does things like this to break the fear off of us. He gives us challenges to build our power and our strength, and to make us have more faith and love him, and to be able to quiet the fear in our mind and have a sound mind to trust him more. that is what he wants.

When I got older I finally got on the intertube, and honestly I found what it was that I was afraid of...it was the point when it pulls before you are safely on top of the water...when you are halfway in the water...and the noise of the boat pulling at the beginning...that jerk that you initially feel...As I got older though I realized that you had to have that jerk...so that you would have something to overcome...the intertube and the boat work together to overcome that first step...and then you are safe...there will will be bumpy places and there will be rough patches...but you are safe...and I find that it is the same way with cliff diving...you just have to get over that first initial jump...and then you are down and then you have fallen to safety...but its not the free fall that is the scary part...its the jump...

So what are you going to do? are you going to jump? or are you going to compromise and take a smaller leap? I know that as for me...I will follow God to the fullest that I can...and just watch out below because Im about to fly.

Friday, September 3, 2010

College Lessons/Facts

So it is official i just completed my third week of classes here at CFNI. and I have blogged very very little, unlike what I promise, but not unlike what I expected...oops. So I figured I would take some time to teach you guys some amazing things that I have learned while here. You ready for this?

  1. JalapeƱo Cheetos are my absolute favorite thing that has ever been created
  2. A Can of Pringles takes about 1 day to completely devour, mainly because i think it is fun to reach the silver metal at the bottom.
  3. Everyone likes Oreos...not everyone likes Fritos
  4. A small can if Tuna makes exactly 2 fairly good portioned Sandwiches
  5. Buying bread can be more complicated than it looks...do i want the cheap kind or the one with the cute little girl or the one with the soccer kids? wait why does the bread have soccer kids on it...what does that have to do with bread...i like soccer...i dont like bread...maybe this bread tastes better...but that little girl is really cute...but i dont have that much money should i just get the cheap kind(yes these were my exact thoughts in doing this)
  6. Sleeping in Class is really easy to do. Especially when your teacher speaks in Hebrew
  7. Public School kids are the minority in Jesus school.
  8. Morning Worship is necessary...it pumps you up and gets you loving Jesus like crazy right at the beginning of the day
  9. Not every Lecture speaker is good, and some have funny voices...if they do dont laugh...find something to occupy your thoughts, DONT DRAW ATTENTION TO YOURSELF
  10. look the teachers dead in the eye, if you dont you will get called on (this fact only works 50% of the time btw)
  11. Don't EVER call yourself a failure in the presence of the staff here at CFNI, because they are AMAZING and they will take the time and stop the class to come right over to you and look you in the eye and tell you you are fantastic and you are loved. (most of these things are not personal experiences by the way...except for the food stuff...that was all me)
  12. Skype is fun, but Skype makes you homesick, but Skype makes you overly happy so you continue to do it.
  13. Having a pet plant is one of the best pets you could ever have.
  14. when getting a pet plant make sure you know what kind of plant it is, so that you dont have to answer like me...Q: what kind of plant do you have? A: A green one?
  15. Everyone finds it extremely weird that I am obsessed with Disney Princesses.
  16. When Mom sends you boxes you get really weird things...like a round tuit from an exterminating company...which by the way i DID NOT GET...mom had to explain it like 20 times
  17. Sidewalk Chalk is the best thing ever.
  18. Doodling in class takes over all of your notes...especially if your doodles are elaborate drawings...like disney characters...but then again little doodles take over too...Whitneys notes always look like some kind of astrology map or something
  19. I have a legit personality...i know i took a personality thing to find out more about myself and how to build my character for class...i cant tell you what it is because i dont remember myself what it is...but i have one
  20. When living in the Ghetto going to the movies past 7 requires an ID
  21. Vaccumming and talking to my roommate results in lots of laughter and finally talking to myself...because she decided to walk out of the room and see how long it would take before i realized she was gone...hmm
  22. BUGS terrify Ariana...especially HUGE ones with big stingers...but they fascinate Vanessa...so therefore when you have big bugs...there is lots of screaming and tragically epic fails that should be video taped
  23. Card games with Vanessa are not fun...they are torture...but i play them anyways...so she can laugh at me because i suck at them
  24. When you go to get in the shower and you find shoes in the shower dont ask your roommate why because you may get an answer like..."I accidently wore them in the shower....i just forgot to take my shoes off i guess" then you are stuck in the state of laughing so hard that it takes a while for you to get ready
  25. The Skin Color is the most essential color for a princess coloring book...guess what color was not in the pack of crayons that I got from my mother
  26. Chapstick is necessary in Texas
  27. Texas Weather is ADD...it goes from 11o to 70 like that...i snapped...then i realized you probably didnt catch that...
  28. When not having TV to watch you find yourself drooling every time your near one...im not even joking...I HATE TV TOO...thats the funny thing
  29. Cartoon movies make everyone happy no matter what age
  30. Despicible me is a popular movie here at CFNI...just sayin
  31. Writing songs about plants named fido makes everyone happy...especially when 3 part harmony to such a bizzarre song comes into play
  32. LOTS OF PEOPLE PLAY BASS
  33. there really are people from around where I live here! WOAH
  34. Naps are good...i love them with everything in me...too bad they have to end.
  35. Netti Pots still haunt me even though i am hours and hours away...grr
  36. My mother is still threatening to ground me at times...and I am on my own now...how sad is that.
  37. Leaving your roommate alone for the weekend results in superglued toes...dont ask we are not that sure how she did that
  38. FedEx does not like to let you nap when they are wanting to give you a package...grr
  39. When receiving letters from Cara...hype up the ADD in you...because she is SUPER ADD
  40. God is doing something amazing here at CFNI and I am so glad that I get to sit here in the presence of these great leaders it is great what I am learning, and how i am growing so much in the Lord.
  41. I miss every single one of my friends, and I hate that you guys are not here with me
  42. Being far away from everyone has made me love them so much more than before.
  43. I am excited to go home and see everyone. and i cant wait to tell you guys all about what I am learning in person. because i cant type it out...its just too amazing
Hope you enjoyed. I hope to blog again soon


Werent all of those fun facts fun?!?!?!? yeah...im feeling ADD